Aaaaahhh…Maine July 31, 2010

I’m sitting in a hammock chair in Maine very similar to the one I sat in 10 1/2 months ago where I started this blog. The sun feels warm on my skin. The birds are singing in the trees. There’s a cool breeze that keeps the chair swingingfrom side to side – and I’m happy. Blissfully, outta my mind happy.

It’s been a terrific first few days on this Maine trip filled with delicious local, organic food, chickens running free in the backyard, nature walks, and a dip or two in cool mountain lakes. This is how life should be!

The one thing absent from the trip has been the omnipresent “lobstah” which is on everyone’s mind, and menu, and plate, and hot dog bun in this state. Jeff and I have joked that we want to open a vegan restaurant called “The Happy Lobster” right here in Maine where we don’t serve lobsters but we rescue them and let them swim in huge pools where you can watch them play while you eat. Our motto: We proudly don’t serve Maine lobster! Jeff also had a funny idea for a t-shirt (since every souvenir shop is heavily laden with gratuitious lobster claws and fuzzy lobster likenesses) with an angry lobster that says, “How’d you like it if I cracked you open and sucked out your muscles?” But I digress…

Starting this blog to chronicle my journey from desk jockey to yogi was a challenge from fellow traveler, Sonia, who I crossed paths with on my last trip to Maine. She encouraged me to start writing about my experiences and it has been a rewarding practice to say the least. It has been a great way to measure my own progress, connect with others on similar paths, and give and receive inspiration along the way. When I received the book “29 Gifts” from another fellow traveler last week I had a hunch I’d just encountered my next great challenge and I was right! I devoured the book over my first few days here in Maine and have been so inspired by the author’s commitment to give 29 gifts in 29 days that I’ve decided to join the movement and start my own 29 day giving cycle when I get home! I’d love to officially start right away but I feel it may be unfair to my travel buddies to make this ritual part of our trip. I have been looking for opportunities to give, though, and have found a few chances to practice giving before my official start in a few days. Until then – more blueberries and hammock naps and beautiful Maine weather and lobster-free dinners for me.

For more info on 29 Gifts and how to start your own giving challenge visit www.29gifts.org.

The Gift July 22, 2010

About a week ago a friend I’ve known since high school wrote to me on Facebook (what did we do to keep track of old friends and distract ourselves before FB anyway???) and asked for my address because she had a surprise to send me. I love receiving surprises and quickly sent back my address. I figured that I’d shortly receive some chachki from our high school days – something that would remind me of a goofball classmate or pain-in-the-butt teacher that would have me laughing for days. Over the week that followed I forgot about the surprise so was totally surprised (yeah!) when I returned home from visiting with a massage client this morning to find a big white box with my name on it at the bottom of our spiral steps. My surprise!!! It was bigger than I’d expected, and a little heavier too! I tore through the tape with a kitchen knife (I can be impatient sometimes…) and opened the box. It felt like Christmas morning as I peeled back the blue tissue paper to reveal a new book. My initial reaction was pure excitement. Jeff and I leave for a trip to Maine in 5 days and I’ve been bummed about the lack of reading materials to take on the trip. Now I’ll have a book to read on the beach! Then I started to wonder…why did Melanie send this book to me? It’s not my birthday and it’s not as if we’ve ever discussed this book before. I inspect the jacket and find that it’s called “29 Gifts…How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life” by Cami Walker. Sounds cool. Definitely the type of book I’d be interested in reading. I get the same feeling in the pit of my stomach that I got 13 summers ago when another high school friend, Lynnette, encouraged me to read a book called “The Celestine Prophecy”. That book in many ways started my spiritual journey which lead to me seeking out massage therapy and the study of yoga. I felt excited and curious and as if the book was meant for me to read. After all, it was my surprise!

I opened the front cover to find a note inside:

Hi Brian!

I just finished reading this book and thought it was awesome! I’m starting my own 29 gifts challenge and as my first gift I’m passing this book on to you because I think you’ll enjoy it.

Happy Reading!

Melanie

Too cool! I am so excited by my new book and the receipt of this gift that I’m thinking whoever thought up this “29 Gifts” concept really knew their stuff. I decide to jump right in and read the prologue to learn that the book’s author, Cami Walker, was presented with the prescription to give 29 gifts in 29 days by a friend and spiritual healer named Mbali. She was offering Cami a way to step outside of herself and get some perspective during one of her many bouts with MS. I’m fascinated immediately by this woman’s story and can’t wait to read on.

So now I have a beach book for the Maine trip. And potentially a life-changing prescription to increase happiness and decrease self-centeredness. And perhaps fodder for 29 new blog posts once I’m done reading.

Thanks Melanie!

Extra! Extra! NJ Namaste News Issue #1 July 19, 2010

 

I’m so excited to share this digital version of the new yoga lifestyle magazine that my partner Tarra and I have published. It’s been an uplifting project from start to finish and now friends and blog readers far and wide can get a chance to read our first issue. Let me know what you think!

If you know anyone who may be interested in advertising or listing their yoga classes in our fall issue send them to www.njnamastenews.com or have them call us at 732-659-7365.

Click here to open the magazine viewer in a separate window.

How a Career Finds You July 17, 2010

I woke up today with a full schedule ahead of me: teaching yoga at 9am, private client at 11:30, spa shift with 2 clients at 3pm. The past several weeks have been relatively slow since people travel a lot in the summer and have plenty of outdoor activities to choose from instead of getting a massage. A part of me was beginning to worry about how/where the paychecks would come from now that I work for myself and don’t have the “day job crutch” to fall back on. So all in all I’m feeling pretty grateful today. The sun is shining, it’s unbearably hot, I’ve got my table in the backseat, and I’m massaging and teaching all over central Jersey!

Right now I’m enjoying a little break in the day while blogging from the spa where I work part time called Onsen for All. It’s an awesome space that’s inspired by Japanese hot springs. The owners converted an old historic home in the town of Kingston, NJ into this amazing wellness center complete with hot soaking tubs, sauna, massage and skincare treatment rooms, and a yoga studio. I feel really grateful that this is the place I get to come to work! Even on a day when I have a full plate, I’m reminded as soon as I hear the soothing music in the halls that there are FAR worse places to earn a living! I’m really blessed to be able to make a living doing something I love. Today I’m grateful, tomorrow I’ll probably be scared about the uncertainty of it all. Watch out!

I’ve been talking a lot lately with people about how we choose our careers (or rather how they choose us). I always credit 2 old friends who I haven’t spoken with in years for inspiring me to get into massage. The first, named Donna, was the first professional massage therapist I’d ever met. We met while I was living in South Florida one summer in the mid 90’s. I observed her carefree, easygoing life as an MT and really felt drawn to the profession. It seemed like a really noble job to devote your life to helping others relieve their chronic pain while at the same time encouraging them to relax. Fast forward five years later, and I was working in marketing, was a recent college graduate, and was mostly happy with my job at the time. I came across another friend who was doing a yoga teacher training program and was a very insightful guy. We’ve since lost touch over the years, but he asked me a question that has profoundly changed the direction of my life. He asked, “If there was one thing you could do, and you knew you wouldn’t fail, what would it be?” My almost reflexive response was, “I’d go back to school and become a massage therapist.” He responded, “Well…what’s stopping you?” I knew then and there that I had to continue this journey to fulfill the role I was meant to fill in this life. I’m happy with the career I’ve chosen (or that’s chosen me) and am grateful to the friends that helped point me in the right direction toward massage therapy (and eventually yoga).

There’s a word used in the practice of yoga (dharma) that means the fulfillment of one’s purpose. We all have our own dharma and I believe that we usually feel most secure and “on the right track” when our actions are aligned with that greater purpose. I’m wondering if anyone else out there has had a similar experience where a career has “found them”. Are there others out there that feel wholeheartedly that they are living their dharma? Are some of you folks out there in cyberland unsure what your dharma really is? Do you sense your dharma is different from your current profession but are scared to embrace it for fear of failure? I’d love to hear from other yogis (or non-yogis alike!) about the topic.

Thanks to everyone reading the blog. Your feedback through Facebook and on this site has been terrific! I’m grateful for all of you too!

Making Peace July 7, 2010

If you’re anywhere in the eastern third of the US and you’re reading this it’s probably too hot where you are. For the past several days heat records have been shattering left and right, temperatures have soared over 100 degrees and most people are really fretting about the latest heat wave. Six months ago we had “snowmageddon” now I guess we’re experiencing “too-hot-calypse” or something like that. Maybe it’s the yoga teacher in me, but I try not to focus too much of my energy on things like this that are beyond my control. Rather than worrying about the heat and complaining about how uncomfortable it is, I try to make a choice to just be at peace with things as they are right now. It can certainly be challenging when running errands in the midday heat when the temperature is closing in on 105. But in the end, what good does complaining about the weather do? Not much.

There’s a word for this attitude in yoga practice. We call it santosha, which can be translated as “contentment”. It’s definitely easy to practice santosha when things are comfortable, life is moving along peacefully, and there’s not much to tempt us away from the peaceful seat of contentment. It can be more challenging when it’s uncomfortably hot or when life hands you an unpleasant surprise. Last week I was driving around town delivering copies of the new magazine to businesses in the area that share a similar mission to ours. The weather was absolutely beautiful. I was ecstatic to have a car full of bundles of the new magazine that we’d worked so hard on for many weeks. I was spending the middle of the day outdoors while working and doing something I loved. I couldn’t have experienced a greater state of santosha if I’d tried. Then as I was traveling from one distribution point to another I was cut off by another driver and despite making every effort to avoid a collision we ended up having an accident. The police were called, medics arrived, my front end had some slight damage and my license plate was crumpled. Santosha became instantly harder. In retrospect I wonder, “How in the world could anyone be content with that situation?” Well, that’s the funny thing about practicing contentment. We’re really not given a choice about when to be content and when not to be. To allow contentment into our lives we need to make peace with the entire range of human experience – not just the afternoons at the beach, ice cream sundaes, and kudos for a job well done. By denying ourselves the opportunity to practice contentment in the midst of difficulty we’re limiting our ability to fully be in the moment. It’s when we can be content with the less pleasant things in life that we can connect with that part of ourselves that is eternal and boundless and unaffected by things like a car accident or triple digit heat. So as I sat there in my car and looked at the woman who’d caused our collision, I realized that there was a choice to be made between losing my cool and finding my center. Instead of blowing my stack and ruining her day even more (and mine in the process) I simply asked, “Are you okay?” At first she didn’t answer, but simply looked frustrated and tense as she fumbled for her license and insurance card. I just kept asking, “Are you okay?” until she assured me she was in fact “okay” (whatever that means) and we had both cooled down a bit. It would be ridiculous to suggest that I “enjoyed” my first-ever automobile collision. There were a million things I could probably think of that I would rather have done that stand there on the side of the road wasting precious daylight on a beautiful day as I awaited the emergency services to arrive. I guess the point of practicing contentment is to realize that there is no escaping the unexpected. We all will face highs and lows throughout our experience of this human life. By not letting the extremes get us too elated or too deflated the beauty of our inner grace or our true Self can shine through.

The 12 Step folks use probably the best known verse on the topic to close their meetings and I think it’s a fitting way to end this post:

God grant me the serenity

To accept the things I cannot change

The courage to change the things I can

And the wisdom to know the difference

TODAY’S KARMA SCOREBOARD

It was too darn hot so I took the day off and went to the beach (+3)

Accidentally killed two flies that I tried to swat off my legs as they were biting me (-2)

Got a little too much joy out of standing in the ocean waist deep with my very skittish dachshund in my arms as the waves crashed around us and he tried to jump out of his skin (-1)

The Simple Life July 5, 2010

When I was contemplating the benefits of leaving my 9 to 5 job in order to work from home on massage, yoga and New Jersey Namaste News I had a rather long mental list of positive effects in mind: shorter commute, flexible hours, feeling of accomplishment, more soul-fulfilling career, no more rush hour traffic, more creative outlets, etc. The one thing that I hadn’t counted on at all, but I’m finding to be quite dear to me, is just how joyous a simple life can be.

I still have plenty of work to do. I make it to my home office everyday to get at least a few hours of work done. However, by making an adjustment to my daily life by removing the commute, making my job more gratifying, and just slowing the pace down in general there seems to be so much more time for enjoyable things: daily yoga practice, dinner together as a family, taking the dog for a walk at dusk, etc. Each year when I head up to Sewall House for yoga retreat it’s always funny to me how much time me and the other guests spend just sitting on the porch – talking, eating, reading, watching cars and people pass, smelling the roses or just sitting there. Time to slow down is built into life there. They actually list “porch sitting” as an outdoor activity on their brochure! I cherish that time there on the porch when I visit the retreat each year. Now I have a porch here at my own house. It’s one flight of stairs and 20 feet away from my desk right now. Yet, there are days when it feels a million miles away. When I pay attention to my to-do list and worry about being productive instead of happy it seems impossible to find a few minutes a day to just sit on the porch and enjoy some stillness.

If nothing else, this life change I’m experiencing has given me more time to explore stillness. Last night as several of our neighbors launched impromptu fireworks displays from their backyards, we sat on the back porch talking, feeling the cool breeze, and just “porch sitting”. It felt so simple and easy and gratifying that it makes me wonder why we don’t put activities like this near the top of our to-do lists!

Guilty Pleasure July 1, 2010

It’s been nearly a week since I left the comfy window seat at my desk job for the freedom of self-employment. In addition to having regular commitments with a nearby spa to offer massage and yoga and several residential communities where I teach regular weekly classes the rest of my work week is filled with cultivating my own private massage business and publishing the newly released NJ Namaste News magazine.

Week 1 of this new adventure has been filled with lessons about relaxing and letting go. For a decade I punched someone else’s time clock, stressed about someone else’s bottom line and had a daily routine dictated by (you guessed it) someone else. Now that I’m calling the shots it is really rewarding and somewhat challenging. I’m finding that I can have tendencies toward workaholism. But it seems a little ridiculous to struggle for months and months to earn this freedom only to surrender it immediately. When you have your own business there’s always work to be done and the boundary between work/home life is blurred when your office is steps from the bedroom. Today I made a commitment to myself (and Jeff and the dachshund) to head to the beach today, on a “workday”, and not do any work. We had an amazing day! We learned that Dash enjoys eating seashells and does not like the ocean for it is too big and scary. It was wonderful to just relax far away from the home office and enjoy a day outdoors in the beautiful weather.

So why did I call this post “Guilty Pleasure”? Well, while I was enjoying the time at the beach there was still a nagging voice in my head telling me that I should be working, not goofing off, and telling me that I need to work even harder now that I’m my own boss. I guess that there’s some truth in that sentiment. I’m definitely finding that it is MUCH harder to work for yourself and be accountable for all of the aspects of “earning your keep” as it were. But I had to remind myself that one of the main reasons I wanted to become a massage therapist and yoga teacher was the freedom it would afford me to take random Wednesdays and head to the beach for some R&R. Sometimes you have to relax and let go. You’d think that for a guy who makes it a living to help others breathe, let go, relax, connect with an inner guide that I’d be more in touch with this stuff, but I’ve always been an overachiever. And unfortunately it’s too easy to bring those tendencies to my current work.

I must say that despite all of my feelings of guilt about allowing myself a day off, those feelings are far outweighed by the pleasure of spending half a day at the beach with your family or sitting on the porch while blogging and watching fireflies light up the darkening summer sky. This is what life’s about after all. It’s not about deadlines or achievements or making money or crossing items off of a to-do list. It’s about finding what feels right for your soul and doing it. Today what felt right was the beach. Tomorrow I’ll probably be back to shlepping bundles of my surprisingly heavy new magazine around town and trying to sell ads. I guess that’s what’s so exciting about being the boss. Each new day is up to you. Some days you’ll work hard and others you’ll hardly work. I guess there’s no sense in feeling guilty about that.

Dash is inside sleeping on a pile of wet beach towels. He probably needs a walk before bed and they definitely need to be thrown in the wash before they grow feet and learn to walk themselves. Wishing you all the “unguiltiest” of pleasures!